Research at its best

Interesting

It has been known for many years that sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary" research, a team of scientists proudly presents its results:

REMOVING PARTNER'S CLOTHES:
With consent.................................12 Calories
Without consent.......................2187 Calories

UNHOOKING HER BRA:
With both hands.................................8 Calories
With one hand...................................12 Calories
With your teeth..............................485 Calories

PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection................................... 6 Calories
Without an erection....................... 3315 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary......................................... 12 Calories
69 lying down.................................... 78 Calories
69 standing up...............................8812 Calories
Wheelbarrow....................................216 Calories
Doggy Style......................................326 Calories
Italian chandelier..........................2912 Calories

ORGASMS (hers):
Real..................................................112 Calories
Fake...............................................1315 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging.........................................18 Calories
Getting up immediately....................................36 Calories
Explaining why you got up immediately.......816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:
If you are: 10-19 years................................... --20 Calories
20-29 years......................................................... 36 Calories
30-39 years......................................................... 80 Calories
40-49 years........................................................124 Calories
50-59 years......................................................1972 Calories
60-69 years......................................................7916 Calories
70 and over.......................................................Results are still pending

DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly...................................................................32 Calories
In a hurry.............................................................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door...........5218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door..........13,521 Calories
Results may vary.