Bashment Breezes

Breezes Mobay has a nice property.

They don't have adequate parking inside (I didn't bother to check outside cause that wasn't gonna happen). But the staff are friendly. Security found us a spot. Smiled up with us and oogled Kelly. Perhaps he wasn't smiling up with me. Hmmmm!

We entered the foyer and the check-in clerk greeted us. I told her who I was and she hopped to. An outline of all activites available was given to us and we were directed to the main areas. Unfortunately we got no complementary room to change in, instead we had to use the bathrooms in the main area. The women's bathroom, I understand, was a little cramped and the first stall as you entered had a low wall so your business was slightly exposed. Men's bathroom was large enough but the toilet was apparently the victim of an alcohol induced emesis (splashes on sides).

The beach area was very clean with lots of beach chairs. I've seen larger properties with less than half the number of beach chairs as I saw yesterday. It meant I didn't have to hunt for one and snatch one from an unsuspecting tourist thinking that "Jamaica no problem". They also had hammocks which we enjoyed as well. They had water trampolines, smaller than the ones at Marguarittaville Mobay, but still quite useful. Some strange dread-locked creatures swam in from the sea and rested under the trampolines catching their breath before a stealth attack on the beach ("you want some good Jamaican weed?"). The tourists were pasty but fairly friendly. They bought into the notion that all 'islanders' are friendly too. I tried not to disappoint (it helped that they soon left before I had to drown one to make a point).

Security was an obvious presence but unlike 1993 at Jamaica Grande I didn't have to hide. I WAS LEGIT!!!! Bwah ha ha ha ha !!

Lunch time!!! Food was excellent. I disappointed myself by only being able to tackle soup (I had less than Kelly), pasta, tossed salad, fruit plate. Kelly had desert. I didn't get to try their chicken, fish, pork, beef (sniff sniff). I did have white wine, pina colada, get laid and then slept in a hammock.

Dinner - We got to the grill late and so got 'what-lef'. The hot dog didn't work well with Kelly but I stuck with jerked chicken which they couldn't spoil. No Jamaican can spoil chicken, not when our unofficial national dish is chicken. All day long we enjoyed the hospitality of the staff which was excellent (I've been on the receiving end of loads of crap/prejudice over the years from staff of various hotels who thought I wasn't of the right hue). I felt so comfy and at home as if I really was a guest....I was though wasn't I?!

Big up Breezes Mobay!!

P.S. If it wasn't for the tropical storm rain between Runaway Bay and Mammee Bay stretch and the truck holding us at bay on Mount Diablo/Rosser (sp?), we'd have done better return time than 3hrs 30min.